Internet down

Today I only got one class and everything are supposed to be simple but...as usual...my life will just have to have something come up at the last second... The incident happen like this: after I put in my part of the assignment, the whole assignment should be complete but my internet connection had a melt down and my info is unavailable to be reached so it turn out that my only contribution to the group became the introduction and taking it to print only... Sigh...I don’t want to be a vase, because that is just pathetic... I hate it when things that don’t go smooth affect not just me but others as well... Everything just stuck there because of the melt down, almost the same when your computer hang, u have the computer with you but u just can’t do anything with it... crush my mood only so... I decided to wait until next morning to finish it...

I do my other things, after a while I try to sign in and continue to chat with my brother and friends but in the end, even my blog have to wait until this morning to be update, after I post up my blog and just sign in to facebook, before I get to find any info, the internet crash again. Now only I realize that internet plays such an important role of my life... I have to admit that I am not pleased but... it’s ok, I can deal with that... I just wish it could just choose a time where I don’t need it this urgent to melt down...

About internet, I remember about something...I kind of gave up on everything that is important to me some time ago... Well...at that time, I kind of live in my room... I have done nothing except for draw a little bit and read a little book, I don’t go online, don’t use computer except when I wanted to play a little offline games. I even try to read the dictionary...I have practically become the ultimate “otaku”... but for some reason...I don’t hate that life, I actually feel quite comfortable with that because, in that half year of my life, it is the first time I feel peace... nothing is wrong, I don’t work, I don’t talk, don’t care what am I wearing, don’t care about my hairstyle, no accidents, no adventure, no test, no problems waiting to be solve... it’s just so...calm...but...it’s boring....

I am a pity person that can’t bared to live peacefully, I need troubles and I need problems, I need adventure, to me...calm and normal is not enough...it just don’t fit me that much... am I too greedy? I actually want a life that I can live, not just survive in, and wanted to be alive...not just functioning... I know that is a lot to ask but, at least I have the right to hope... I want to know more, experience new things, try new food for example...I haven’t ate spider before, haha....

That is about it; I now have to completely focus on study and will not be posting anything if it is not extremely important or unique...