Determination?

I was suppose to write diary everyday but then I just go here and there until I FORGOT to do so~ I wonder if I can still remember everything later when I try to write back some of the important and happy ones~^^

Some said that it is better to just remember the happy things and forget about the angry and sad things~ I agree on that and will only write important and happy things in my stuff~^^

I keep on thinking that I am not happy probably because I think too negative and I only write down what is negative and complains~ I should turn this around and be a happy person~ Hopefully my joy and happy aura can bring out the more gentle and good part of pp~ =)

DETERMINE TO BE A HapPyYyyYyYyyyYyyYyYyYyYy Person!!!~ haha =p

My Birthday~

Start with SWEET memory first:
Out of a sudden~ I did something CRAZY again!!! I went to LANGKAWI with friends abruptly with a last minute notice =p BANANA BOAT!!!~ WoHooOooo!!!! Then we had a WHOLE BODY THAI SPA!!!^^ hehe~ I try BEACH DRESS for the first time and got a BIKINI as present from her^^ Was asked on stage, and gotten REALLY DRUNK at night~ haha~ FUN!!! The next day we bought a lot of CHOCOLATES and went PENANG~ At night, TAO for dinner^^ then CLUBBING!!! MOIST~ She went for SEXY DANCE competition~ Watching her dance suddenly lead me thinking back a lot of SWEET memory (@v@) The next day, we ate at T BOWL~ Watched a movie, and do a little shopping^^ Actually I am just glad that I get to spend my birthday with her, haha (^o^)v I am Janice Choo and I am happy (^o^)~

Now for the NOT SO SWEET part:
I have to let go of my chance to go PANGKOR with my other gang of friend and kinda made one of my sister emo about that~ GUILTY!!! =( The bad part is~ I miss out the chance to go out with a friend that is going back GERMANY~

Now~ THE PAIN part:
Both physically and emotionally injured, everything was fun until PENANG, when at TAO, she got emo and it was obvious until I can't pretend that I don't see it, was due to er EX =( Then at moist, she got drunk really fast, and ended up HUGGING a GUY, my mood CRASHED!!! My leg went swollen and body injured due to preventing her from falling~ In room, she said things that I almost think she can KILL ME WITH WORDS~ I keep on apologizing to the girl that brought us there but then the girl went apologizing to me because my birthday ended up in TEARS~ FUCK!!!! Then the next day on the way home, she said something that SHATTERS me, " After my ex, I couldn't find back the feeling of love anymore" Does this mean she had NEVER loved me? Or she just completely forgot that we DATED before?

Happy and sad at the same time~

Haha~ what a weird feeling~ Today is nice~ I sleep, play, and eat whole day^^ Not bad if once in a while my life is this peaceful and quiet^^ Today I know that I have made the right choice^^ The post was meant for me~ I know^^ It writes, "你给的爱,太过沉重...不是你不好,而是我只想单身... " I am somehow happy that my love is notice but this feeling also make me wanna cry while smiling =')

I will buried everything deep inside my heart =) as I said~ she will never have to know~ but still~ I wish that someday there will be a person that can give her the right feel =') I suddenly recall that I once said to her~ "I will be happy for her if she found someone that make her happy even if the person is not me"

My heart can only take so much~ No more of this true love thingy~ Maybe it's just not my thing =) But I have no regret in trying and at least I know that I give out my best b4 (^_^)